Hello all :3 /help needed [non TEF]

Bayleen's picture
I know I haven't been active much on here, but I do come in and stalk some blogs every once in a while xD

How are you all? I hope you're doing well and are enjoying your lives.
As for me, I am starting school in two days and I will be a junior in high school. I'm excited, nervous, kind of everything xD
This is the year when my school is going to have us focus on colleges and job options for the future. And I have some thoughts on this subject... and I wanted to share them with you guys and ask for advice because I know a lot of wise people on here and I'm comforted by the fact that I can always turn here for help <3

[warning, I tend to go on tangents especially on this topic, so I apologize ahead of time if this ends up being quite long to read hehe]

So... Ever since I could remember I've always wanted to be a singer. But as I grew up, I decided to be more realistic and changed it to being a therapist or a writer. And now, I realize that nothing gives me more happiness than singing and it's something I really would want to do as a career. But lots of people are telling me that I should just do that on the side and pair it up with another "more professional" career.

I understand that- the concept of having something to fall back on. But in my mind, I know that being an artist, especially now that everyone wants to be noticed and all that, is going to take a lot of hard work and if you want to pursue anything, you must eat, sleep, and drink it. You have to be completely dedicated and work hard. So going to college and pursuing a degree just so I have something to fall back on seems like a waste of money and time.

I personally wouldn't mind living in a crappy apartment, as long as I could make music and it was appreciated, I would be completely content in life.

Also, I have this gigantic fear of the end of the world. It's a reaaaally long story about why but basically my father has talked about the end of the world non-stop ever since I turned 11. It's like this looming dark cloud above my head and I'm afraid that paranoia won't go away easily or soon. So with that in mind, I think about "well what would I want to be doing if I died tomorrow." And the answer was easy- singing.

I've also been going through an existential-crisis sort of thing. Just recently I realized that I am a human being. I am alive, I can do whatever I want, and nothing or no one can stop me. I've thought about how unlimited and yet so so limited we, as humans, are; how money and buildings, and all these material things do not matter and how we can do whatever we want but there's always something stopping us! It makes me sad and upset because of course the world won't change, there is always something in the way...

I don't know.. I'm rambling. I'm just really conflicted. The answer seems so simple, yet complicated. I've come to the conclusion that you do what you want and screw the rest. If it's my life, I should do what I love... right?

It's not like I want to be a super-famous singer either, only with luck will that happen. Singing in coffee shops, stores, etc. I've even been told by enough people that all they can picture me doing is singing. I know I have the talent and the will to do it. Sigh. I just want to sing.

[end]

BUT, I am not an adult, living in the real world. Not yet. Which is why I'd love some advice, some light to shed on the subject. A big thank-you, ahead of time <3

And sorry if you can barely understand what I was even trying to talk about xD I tried to condense my thoughts in a few sloppily written paragraphs :/ My apologies.

Try doing both. Most of the

Try doing both. Most of the people I know work two jobs, and from the way you describe singing (small scale, coffee shop stuff) you would be hard-won to support yourself off those earnings. Don't give up on singing if it's something you enjoy but prepare for the fact that you might not be able to support yourself doing just that alone.

If your high school offers them, try taking a co-operative educations course. I took one because I thought I wanted to be a teacher and it helped me understand what exactly that job would entail. In a Co-operative education course, you get placed in a work environment in your chosen field, so you can experience what that job would involve before you decide it's what you want your life to be about. It helped me immensely and saved me thousands of dollars in the long run (I chose not to go to teachers collage). You might want to look at being placements at recording companies, or a newspaper editors office; something related to professional writing or music.
HolyMaria's picture

Hello Bayleen, I want to

Hello Bayleen,
I want to share something with you:
When I just started college I was obsesed with getting good grades and finishing the career in the shortest possible time, I did not care about anything else, my family, my girlfriend, my friends. Nothing. Of course that many things collapsed because of that in my life, like my health. I was diagnosed with cancer by the end of that year. I was really lucky, because I survived. I learned a lot because of that experience, but the most important was that I realized I'll die someday, that it is my obligation to enjoy and care about the things that are really important. So, the world, your world, it is going to end someday, and it is a good thing be aware of that at such a young age; of course, not being afraid of it, but living everyday doing what makes you happy.

About your career options, my experience had teach me that there are two separate and different things, your vocation and your profession. It is not always good to rely in what you love the most to satisfy your economical needs, because it ends being instead of a vocation, precisally a profession, an obligation. My advice is that you study a short career that you also like that hopefuly has something to do with music, but that can allow you precisally being able to mantain youself and give you the economical resources for doing what you love. college degrees are just a piece of paper, it doesn't represent what you are. If you're really commited with what you want and your talent, it will be the only thing that matter. But dont wait to start college to do that, that's the advantage artists have, don't wait for studies, start doing music now, maybe you can learn to play an instrument (digital or acoustic) and then you can be teacher and that can be your job while you start a singing career; or you can learn to dj or vj, there are much things you can do for support and help you getting where you want. but start now, dont wait for nothing except for yourself. artist have work much more than everyone else for achieve their goals. Picasso said "to be a great artist is required a 1% talent and 99% effort", and I think that maybe its more like 10/90 haha, but that's not the point.

I hope it helps

<3