The Twin Gods shall rue the day they mocked me!!! RUE!!!

*shakes head* Zelical, it is but a weather change, and you cannot even see it. why do you act so foolish?

Because, dear Vein, my heart aches to be welcomed within the forests' depths once more, unalone, and so they cry for me, with full knowledge that they can grant my wish without a moment's hesitation.

*sigh* Sister...you cannot blame them. You can blame no one, for none of us, nor human creature, knows the exact reason for our ghostly curse. You know that as well as I do.

The Gods do not care about the single, worthless Ghost family that we are. Hush, sister. I shall wander in the rains soon, so you might rest in abyss.

*sighs*...I suppose you are right. But what kind of existence is this? Every day, eternally re-entering an empty forest where everyone thinks you hate them because you cannot see them. I truly wish the waters of the pond could drown me...

Zelly...Zelly, please don't say that...*bows head lowly*...

*blinks, feeling truly bad about saying anything* I'm sorry, sweet Nurra, please forgive me...I didn't mean to sadden you...I...

*glares at anzel menacingly* Come along, Nurra...*nuzzles her away*...

*tears form in her eyes and she walks away with taint*...

*shakes head*...Anzel, why do you strive to be normal? Is it not a blessing to be so unique, so beloved and well-known?

I...I would prefer death, brother Vein. I never wanted this, I never wanted fame or anything of the sort. I want normality...or a chance at it...not this...I can't take this anymore...

Love.

---

How I crave its luring scent. The way it strokes my heart strings and tempts my lips to smile. Knowledge of the feeling of love makes me forget about reality.

But I know that love is something I will never be allowed to have. My curse brings with it the fear of being a burden. I cannot allow myself to be loved. It will only bring them suffering.

So why does my heart still flutter at the sound of his name, and the sight of his set...?

---

How I loathe its putrid scent. The way it slices my heart strings and takes away my smile. Knowledge of reality makes me forget about the feeling of love.

And I know that love is something I can never allow myself to have. My taint brings with it the fear of losing myself. I cannot allow myself to love another. It will only bring me ignorance.

So why does my heart still beat despite my truest of taint, is it because of the flower fae...?

And so I decide
With a rose and a doubt
To give up all hope
And to throw myself out

And so I collide
All in all gone for good
That my heart shall depart
Where my crush, he once stood

Chismeree, Chismerah
I feel left, I feel right
I must be long forgotten...
Crushed, my heart says good night.

---

;-; It's a bit cryptic, but...basically, Anzel is going to try and give up her crush on you-know-who...her low self-esteem has assured her that he never liked her anyways.

Slow-walking eternally. I swear. I love playing Nurra. She's so adorable and sweet and cute.

But my fingers are falling asleep. SLOW-WALKING IS EVIL. ;_;

x3

I feel a slight torn as I depart, wings heavy with choked words. My hands, grasping at the breath that may have once been taken in by her, but always fanning them away without a simple allowance.

I feel my form of the darkest brown bat, faded grey...fading as my hairs. Slowly I return to my form of the tan male deer creature, antlers heavy with pumping blood, front hooves aching to be connected with the back once more.

I begin to run.

And though this forest is eternal, I needn't worry about running into fae creature once again; for my wings, my pulse, all seperate from me as I run...and yet, they connect.

The blood running through my veins feels fresher, more alive, but more afraid. And I cannot stop to wonder as to why I can never be the stag in the eyes of another...because I already know I am a half-breed, neither vampire nor deer...

And I am a ghost. Plain and simple.

And so, with haste...

I feed.

Can anyone see me in the forest at -all-? I can't really ask anyone anywhere else :/ Please let me know ;-;

Emiva the doe
Cladden in the wooden brown
Mahogany heart

Dusting over smooth
For a life can change so soon
Must the eye adapt

Tranceless walking fore
Steps will syncronize her way
Follow with desire

Gentle meant the fae
Guiding us and guiding all
To a better day

---

Nope, they don't make any sense really...I just let my index fingers tap the letters out randomly :3

A plainly fae wanders in, with purple floras dangling from each antler. She is smiling softly, sadly, as though she is hiding something. Her eyes glance around at the wooded terrain around her.

Clearing here throat, she speaks, "Hello, is anyone there?...it's Anzel."

(rated DM for drama)

---

Delicacies of the life
Harsh travesties known to death
See me, my ways...are of strife
Force me to breathe everbreath

Daylilies bloom, wilt, and die
Why can this not be my way?
No matter how much I will cry
I will never have the last say

Buzzing of bugs, fluster of trees
Songs of the birds o'er my head
Every day brings more desperate pleas
Every day notches lesser of dead

---

I have remained unseen within the forest realms for many a day, at least...to them. I have seen them, but my troddings have gone unnoticed.

Every day, I fade a little further away, a little further towards the joys of pessimism...

There is no light in my life anymore.

---

(i got firefox, and now i have to put the coding around every separate paragraph...and it's driving me insane)

Aren't mood swings fun?

SO VERY FUN INDEED, YESH THEY ARE.

I'm so angry right now. I want to destroy the world with my mighty fists of fistiness. RAHAHAHAHA.

And I want to destroy this stupid person who is killing their cats by being stupid. Neutering an old male cat WON'T KILL THEM. You shouldn't own cats. GIVE ME YOUR CATS. Stop being so ignorant. Flea bomb your house, or give your cats and remaining kitten away before they, too, die. The shelter won't kill them, YOU will. GAH.

x3

Hehehe. Mwahaha. Mood swings are fun, no? *faints*