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Deer... again... deer!
He had no idea how many times he had changed his appereance now the past days, how many times he had crossed the border between the worlds...
The pain of the transformation bacame a common feeling...
... he got used to it, didn't feel it as 'pain' anymore.
Jack stopped his endles pacing along the row of trees, paused his desperate search for the openings for a moment.
The human faced stag looked horrible.
His white fur was dirty, looked even more shaggy than usual. He had lost a lot of weight the past days, didn't drink or eat much...
He was constantly trembling, his look restless, nervous, rhe head and ears constantly moving.
Searching...
Hoping...
It... it had to be there... somewhere... the right exit.
Illrose had shown him the gabs between the trees... the way out of here.
Though... whenever he crossed the border, whenever he left this goddamn prison...
... he changed...
He changed into a common deer.
A deer!
A common red deer!
He shook his head in anger.
He was no deer.
NOT a filthy animal!
He was human.
HUMAN!
Wasn't he... ?
He shook his head once more, let out a nervous giggle...
There was it again...
... this haunting thought that cought him a few days ago.
Maybe... maybe it was just a lie... a lie...
... everything just a lie...
This other life he believed to have.
This past he believed he had.
Just... just a lie
No. NO.
He was human. HUMAN
Or not...?
Maybe... maybe deer?
Was he a deer in the end.... a filthy little animal, yes....?
The trembling got worse...
... he couldn't stop giggling.
lie, lie, lie, lie, lie
It was all just a lie, soldier, yes...? YES?
NO!
No, no, no, no!
Stop it...STOP IT!
Come on you... you will lose your mind going... going on like this...
...with those... those thoughts...
Don't go on... with those thoughts...
... you... you will just lose your mind
Yes? Yes.
He, he, he.
lie, lie, lie, lie, lie
STOP IT!
Human? Deer? Human? Deer=?
Filthy little animal, captured and locked up for your own entertainment, yes?
The giggling became insane laughter...
... his legs finally failed him.
Maybe he was neither human nor deer?
Maybe... maybe...
They called you a weapon, remember soldier? Remember?
Jack started to cough...
... his throat was dry... it burned...
... god... the thirst...
... and he was hungry...
The carousel of thoughts went on and on...
Doubts growing stronger and stronger...
Has he ever been human?
This place here, this forest, was strange enough..
... maybe it somehow...
... screwed up his mind and memories...
All those memories of the life he believed he had...
... so curel...
No one could ever have stand a life like this without.... going insane... yes?
And... he was pretty sane, actually... yes...?
Just a bit confused.
Deer or human, goddamnit!
What was the truth now, what?!
Why couldn't he tell anymore...?
Come on, one has to know what species one was!
The stag let out a roar...
... could a human even make a sound like this...?
Was this the proof?
Was he... was he just...
...a ... a filthy... filthy little animal...?
He started to giggle again, stared at the tree in front of him , without noticing it.
"Jack...?" a soft, female voice behind him.
The giggling stopped.
He slowly turned his head.
Big, dark eyes looking at him, worried...
Ah...
Yes, yes... Jane...
... sister... love...
She had found him a few days ago, here at the border to the other worlds. She had been worried, couldn't find him anywhere else, thought something terrible happened...
No, no my love, don't worry, my love, I am fine, my love, yes?
Just... just... confused.
She hadn't left his side the past days, had just slept below one of the birtchtrees nearby.
"Jack...?" she spoke again.
The white just kept starring at her, eyes hidden behind the shaded glasses of his goggles...
... still puzzled about this one question.
Deer?... human?
"Ist... ist alles in ordnung?"
('Are... are you okay?')
She came closer, the worries in her eyes grew bigger.
Sister... love...
Wasn't...wasn't she the proof...?
The proof that this past life was the truth..?
Wasn't she the proof that he was a human.
Human.
"Bin... bin... i... ich ein Mensch o... oder ein... ein Tier?"
('Am... am... I... I a human o... or a.. an animal?') he stuttered...
... the trembling made it hard to speak.
The doe with the soft human face tilted her head, grey streaks of hair fell in her face.
"Jetzt... jetzt gerade... oder?"
('In... in this very moment... or..?') she stopped...
"Ein Mensch, natürlich."
('A human, of course.')
Silence for a moment.
The look of doubt on Jacks face didn't vanish, the trembling didn't stop.
Jane lowered her gaze... he looked terrible... weak...
She sat down next to him... close to him.
The trembling got slightly better.
"Ich... ich finde den... den Weg nicht.."
('I... I can't find the... the way') he mumbled, his voice empty.
Jacks head sunk down to the ground, he chuckled.
"Vielleicht.... gibt... gibt es für uns keinen weg hier... hier raus... ich.. ich verliere hier noch meinen verstand, kann nichtmal sagen ob ich... ich wirklich ein Mensch bin..."
('Maybe... there.... there is no way out for.... for us... I... I will lose my sanity here, can't even tell if I... I am a human for real')
Jane remained silent. She knew how much he wished to get out of here, to leave this place... this 'prison'.
... but she was not entirely sure if she wanted the same...
"Du bist ein Mensch... hörst du..? Du und ich... wir... wir sind Menschen. Und... und bestimmt... da gibt es einen Weg heraus..."
('You are a human... hear me...? You and me... we... we are human. And... and... sure there is a way out..') she replied hesitating.
Silence.
Jack gave no reply.
Oh he looked horrible... desperate...
She wanted to help him... say something to lighten his mood...
"Vielleicht... vielleicht weiß ja Jergens...."
('Maybe... maybe Jergens knows...') she stopped immediately. That was stupid now.
Stupid girl, Jane, STUPID GIRL
She knew how much he hated this name, this person.
She didn't know why... though...
No one but Jack himself knew.
The whites head shot up, gave Jane a start.
He had a disturbing looking grin on his face now...
"Ja... ja ja ja JA... der... der Bastard weiß...weißweiß... Ich ich werde ihn fragen, ja ja ja.... und... und dann dann weiß ich endlich"
('Yes... yes yes yes YES... the... the bastard knows... knowsknows... I I will ask him, yes yes yes... und... und then then I know finally...')
He started to snicker and giggle again, before he forcefully hit his head to th ground again.
Jane swallowed, shifted her weight uncomfortably from site to site. Fear grew in her chest...
... he was... in this mood again...
... not himself...
Faded away from himself...
Anything could happen now.
Stupid girl, Jane, stupid! You angered him... stupid girl!
"Ich... ich muss ihn suchen... ja.. JETZT"
('I... I have to search for him... yes... NOW') he tried to get up, trembling giggling...
Jane froze in place.
No... no no he...
...if he now would go and search for that red stag... and find him... it would end terrible.
Her heart started to race.
She had to do something... but... but what...?
Stupid girl, Jane!
He still had troubles to get up... his body was really exhaused... lack of food and water...
... he was weak...
She swallowed again.
"Warte...!"
('Wait...!') she almost screamed.
He froze in place again... slowly turned her face towars her. Stared at her.
She stared back, could see her own reflection in the shaded glasses of his goggles.
The fear took over. Now it was her, who was trembling.
Stupid... supid girl... Jane
She couldn't interpret the look on his face... the grin was gone now...
Her heart was pounting....
"Ich... ich meine..."
('I... I think...')
Still no reaction.
She took a deep breath.
... she had to be courageous now. For him. She had to prevent him from searching for the red stag now... by every means.
"Du... du brauchst ruhe. Wenn... wenn du jetzt aufstehst... nach,... nach ihm suchst... wirst... wirst du... es nicht schaffen...
('You... you need rest. If... if you get up now... search... search for him... you won't... won't make it...')
He was still looking at her.
Somehow she was happy now, that she couldn't see his eyes. Else... she wouldn't have the strenght to go on.
"B... bitte... das... das wäre dumm... oder nicht? Außerdem, willst... willst du das er dich so sieht? So... schwach..."
('P... please... this... this would be stupid... isn't it? Besides, do... do you want him to see you like this? This... weak...')
Jack still didn't say a word... but a slight smile crept on his lips... he turned her head away from her.
Jane's muscles tensed...
... stupid girl... you angered.... him...
"Ja.."
('Yes.')
Her ears perked forward. She blinked.
"Was...?"
('What...?')
He snickered. His head sunk down to the ground again.
"Du... du hast recht... he, he.."
('You... you are right... he, he...') His voice sounded more confident now. More... like himself
Janes heart was still pounting.
"Du... du mein Schwesterherz wirst ihn suchen und... he, he und fragen, ja?... Mir... mir wird er es nicht... nicht sagen... oh nein... nein..."
('You... you my dear sister will search for him and.... he, he and ask him, yes?... He wouldn't tell... tell me.... oh no... no...') he snickered again.
This familiar, plotting snicker.
Janes ears flopped down. This wasn't good. She could have handle an attack... or him screaming at her... she had handled it so many, many times before.
... but this...? What... what was he thinking now...?
Another... of his games...?
"Und... und ich muss mich wirklich ausruhen... ja."
('And... and I really have to rest... yes.') He looked at her again.
"Du suchst ihn. Du fragst ihn.... du fragst ihn nach dem Weg hier raus! Er wird es dir sagen, oh ja, ja... er... er mag dich , ja..."
('You will search for him. You will ask him... you will ask him for the way out of here! He will tell you, oh yes, yes... he ... he likes you, yes...')
Now his voice sounded like he was giving orders to a soldier...
"Versprich es mir... schwester."
('Promise this... sister.')
She didn't need to see his eyes to feel how they pierced right into hers...
... she swallowed again, nodded slowly.
"Ich... ich verspreche es..."
('I... I promise...') she had no choice. She just couldn't...
... those eyes... she couldn't see them... but she just couldn't escape them.
She couldn't escape him.
"Gut... gut... he, he..."
('Good... good... he, he...') he turned his gaze away once more, closed his eyes.
"Geh jetzt... geh... du... du hast einen auftrag, ja mein Herz...?"
('Go now... go... you... you have a mission now, yes my love...?')
She nodded again, slowly got on her hooves...
... while she was backing off she could watch how his breath got deeper, more regular...
... he fell asleep.
He was really exhaused...
The little doe lowered her head, her ears still hanging down.
A mission?
That wasn't exactly what she had wanted...
Well... at... at least Jack wouldn't... wouldn't search for that red stag no himself...
... a weak smile appeared on her face.
That was good. That... was good.
She turned around, walked back, deeper into the forest.
The smile on her face got bigger. Maybe... she had the chance now to...
No... no.
She shook her head.
He would notice it. And... he would be angry at her. Very angry.
Maybe... he would even...
... no she didn't want to lose him...
She lost him once... and it felt terrible.
She was lost without him.
She sighed.
Just accomplish this mission, stupid, stupid girl.
Oh, this is interesting. ^^
Ohoho, now I see~ Awesome
Awesome job, of course c':
oh, you see, yes...?
thanks you two <3
double post wut? >=(
'Interesting' is such a
(little selfish note ahead)
"Bin... bin... i... ich ein Mensch o... oder ein... ein Tier?"
-> Just thank the Twins he didn't asked me this question, else he would get so philosophical answer searching for the true depths of existence, that I would probably earn serious headache caused by Jack's knocking-down head stroke, I believe.
*snorts* It would have been
It would have been interesting to watch / hear that conversation, though.
Hurrhurr. Much love. Wonder
Do tell via Skype? 8D
No. >:O be patient xD
be patient xD
I love reading these
Ah it's so nice to read such
Aand we still keeps on