An IRL update...bad news about Dad... (R.I.P. 7/24/10)

quadraptor's picture
Hey guys, I think I mentioned to a few of you before that my Dad was going through some tough times with cancer. If I haven't told you what was going on, here's basically what has happened:

Dad developed cancer last year. They tried chemotherapy and it helped but didn't get rid of it, so they operated on him. The operation was successful, and he had two colostomies put in.

We thought everything was fine, and then he developed liver cancer. They originally said that it was the kind where they could remove that part of his liver and it would regenerate, but instead they decided to do more chemotherapy.

Well, weeks went by, and the chemo didn't help. Didn't hurt, but it didn't do anything to the cancer.

Today, they said that his cancer has spread to pretty much everywhere in his lower stomach area, and that there's nothing more they can do. Operating on him would be useless since it's spread so much. They will continue to do chemotherapy to try to help him out, but as far as fixing it, it's not going to happen.

So all the grief and trouble we've gone through trying to make my dad better has gone to waste. The doctor didn't give him a life expectancy, but now we can pretty much say that it's only a matter of time. What I understand is that if the liver fails, his brain could shut down.

It's really hard to think about, especially since this month I'll be in the western US for four weeks. This could be my last week to spend with him if...well...it happens during my trip. I'm praying not, I'm hoping that I'll be able to come home in June and he'll still be here watching sports and telling me game show trivia. I'm really hoping so.

Please, if you get the time, keep my dad and my family in your prayers. It'll really help, no matter what happens.


Please read the updates in the comments, but Dad passed away on 7/24/10 at about 5:30 AM.

I know he's at peace and am glad he isn't suffering anymore. He was 67 years old, and was a great man.

At least he is at peace. No

At least he is at peace. No one is ever truly gone.
<3
Serenai's picture

&hearts; A hymn to those who



A hymn to those who seem to be lost, to give us the comfort and keep us company until they are found once more.

My love, dear. To you and all others.
Icon Art © Beloved
Seed's picture

I'm sorry that this happened

I'm sorry that this happened to your family, Quad.

All my love goes with you right now.
Vala 's picture

...Don't now what to say ,

...Don't now what to say , hug...
" ~ Lady in Red ~ "

♥ ♥

Ourania's picture

So sorry, Quad. -hugs-

So sorry, Quad. -hugs- <3 <3
onyxsoulclaw's picture

Im so sorry to hear of your

Im so sorry to hear of your loss, please may I express my deapest sympathy to you and your family. (sends major hugs) If u need to talk were hear to listen.
Snowsauria's picture

Oh no, I'm so sorry for your

Oh no, I'm so sorry for your loss, Quad. *hugs to you and your family*

May your father rest in peace.
Iaurdagnire's picture

My condolences, Quad. You've

My condolences, Quad. You've shown nothing but bravery throughout all of this... Take care of yourself, and your family ♥
Vala 's picture

In memory of your dad we just

In memory of your dad we just sit down near Run's memory place , we all love you !!<<33
" ~ Lady in Red ~ "

♥ ♥

quadraptor's picture

Thank you. Quad is sitting

Thank you. Quad is sitting with you all there now. He has been sitting by the gravestones at the Ruins for the past few days.

I'm not angry at those who are standing on the memorial (although it is a little hard to watch because I know it's really for Run), but don't think that it is upsetting me when it happens. I appreciate everyone sitting with us, it means so much to me right now.
Verycrazygirl's picture

*Hugstight* You're a really

*Hugstight*
You're a really strong guy, Quad...

You have my condolences, hope you and your family are okay... <3

R.I.P.

R.I.P.
<3

Oh, Quad.. ;__; *hugs*

Oh, Quad.. ;__;
*hugs*

Ourania's picture

Which one is the memorial?

Which one is the memorial? I'll keep that in mind from now on.

Oh no, Quad. ;__; /climbs

Oh no, Quad. ;__;
/climbs over and sends huggles
quadraptor's picture

It's the brightest spot of

It's the brightest spot of light next to the Ruins. We're all sitting there right now if you'd like to come.

Quad, I'm so very sorry.. At

Quad, I'm so very sorry..
At least we know he is in a gentler place and he doesn't hurt anymore.

We all love you, brother Quad.
Flyra's picture

Oh no, Quad... I am so very

Oh no, Quad... I am so very sorry, but I, too, believe he is happy now. He had a wonderful son, he couldn't have had it better with you. I'll remember him...
Rest in Peace.
f l y r a b l o g avatar by tinkee, sig by Quamar
Ourania's picture

Oura was there in that

Oura was there in that pic...the secretary pelt deer is sitting on her lol. Now I know why Vala was telling Oura not to sit there.
Kaoori's picture

I can't stay long. But I

I can't stay long. But I will come sit.
I am so very sorry, Quad. You and your dad are both amazing, brave people.
I'm crying as I type this.

Quad I'm so so so very sorry

Quad I'm so so so very sorry my words won't do much to ease your pain.All I can say is try to stay strong,be with your family,pray to God,and know that your father is as peace.
quadraptor's picture

Ourania - I took a few

Ourania - I took a few more:





I kind of want to write something now...maybe just a story or something.
Kaoori's picture

This song has special meaning

This song has special meaning to me.
I'm sure you've heard it.
Please hang in there.

quadraptor's picture

Thank you, Kaoori, I love

Thank you, Kaoori, I love that song and it means a lot. I'm listening to it now while Quad's sitting with everyone, and the lyrics gave me goosebumps.

A few more photos of our memorial:





Again I know those who don't know what is going on are sitting in the middle, please don't feel like it's upsetting me. I know that getting the message out to everyone in the Forest is impossible, but everyone just being here means so much to me right now. I appreciate everything from you guys.

One of my favorite songs. I



One of my favorite songs. I thought I'd post it for this, hon.

raugh double post.. edit: I

raugh double post..

edit: I apologize for the hopping. My hotkeys are screwed atm
Flyleaf's picture

*Hugs* from me too !

*Hugs* from me too !
Avatar @ Sluggs Siggy @ Amazegenalo
Bouncing Fly by Mary13
Kaoori's picture

I have to go, Quad. But

I have to go, Quad. But remember your family and friends are here for you.
quadraptor's picture

Thank you Kaoori and Seed for

Thank you Kaoori and Seed for coming. Anyone who reads this, you don't have to stay the whole time, just sitting with us for a moment is thoughtful to me.

I might let Quad go sit alone in a little bit if that's okay with everyone. I'm going to have to leave in about an hour - we're going to visit Dad at the mortuary.
Snowsauria's picture

Ghost don't mind sit around

Ghost don't mind sit around for some time.

Of course it's okay, you do what you wish. *hug*
quadraptor's picture

One of Dad's favorite songs.



One of Dad's favorite songs. My brother is making a memorial CD with photos of him and this will be one of the songs he plans to play.

&hearts;&hearts; It sounds

♥♥

It sounds like he led a fulfilled life, and he had a great son to continue on.
Never forget the good times, my friend.

♥♥

Here~ The pictographs formed

Here~
The pictographs formed a heart, so I took a screeny

Hello Quad ... I want to

Hello Quad

...

I want to let you know... that even though I don't know you very well, I mourn with you.
The loss of a family member is always so sad...
And with close ones you have known and loved...
I am so sorry Quad... I really, truly am.

I sit in this tribute circle...
For a moment of silence...
May your father rest in peace...
And may you live a long, healthy, happy life.


- BambooKirin
Ourania's picture

Quad- do whatever you want

Quad- do whatever you want to. We'll be close by if you need us <3

Oh that's so nice Joro. I didn't realize it.
quadraptor's picture

Thank you all for everything.

Thank you all for everything. I apologize but I need to go, we're going to visit Dad at the mortuary now, but I'll leave Quad there. He'll fall asleep but please feel free to stay or leave whenever you'd like.

*nuzzles*
OokamiAzura's picture

Hardly a word is spoken



Hardly a word is spoken between all who gather.

The doe is sporting different attire today. Her Butterfly pelt glows under the lights of the candles resting on her tines. She hardly ever wore the candles, seeing as how there were hardly suitable times to wear them.

Today's a bit different however.

The group is in mourning, the small stag near the center sitting perfectly still. Tears are on the corners of his eyes, but he stands strong in his father's passing.

Flicker, flicker.

The only sounds are the patter of rain, of candles flickering.

One light goes out on her tine. Her shoulders slump in sadness.

The candles can almost serve as a life bar. When they all go out, there will be no more light. Poof. Dead. Gone.

Flicker, flicker.

But she knows that she can always light them again if they go out. They keep dying, she keeps standing and lighting them up. Their light fades away, but she remains alive, determined to keep fixing those damn lights. She's like a child in this moment, pouting and stubborn evermore, desperate to reach that cookie jar every so sneakily left out of her reach.

Her eyes glance towards the young stag again.

His father's candle may have stopped flickering, but he is still here, standing strong, determined to move on, holding precious memories close. He keeps lighting his own candles, his face composed, ready to say the final words, ready to make the final farewell.

She feels something in the air. It's light, and soft, hardly something she would expect on a dismal day like this.

Though here, in this physical realm, the father is all but gone, his spirit remains, smiling and laughing as if he was "here" again. Surely, he must be looking down on his son, telling him to smile and cheer up, that life's not quite over yet, and he still has those cookies in the jar to find and consume.

Flicker, flicker.

The candle relights itself. A smile forms on her Skull.

Don't you worry, elder. Your son's one hell of a strong being. We'll be here to take care of him besides.

It's alright. You can rest now.


The newly light candle seemingly bursts momentarily, a small spark of an explosion. The Butterfly doe sitting next to her jumps a bit at the event, but Lacie herself is smiling evermore, the grin on her face just about stretching it.

She rises, and walks to Quad, as he turns to look at her. They've only met a few times before, hardly said or did anything together.

It really didn't matter, either way.

She lowers her head, dropping the candle square onto his head gently. The candle sparks again, but this time, its light remains intense.

See? He's far from falling.

Far from it.

Rest in peace, elder.

I'm very sorry to hear of

I'm very sorry to hear of what happened to your dad Quad. Sad
*hugs*
Pegasicorn's picture

Quote:July 20, 2010 I'm

Quote:
July 20, 2010
I'm sending you a hug.

Quote:
July 21, 2010
Sent a package a few hours ago via UPS Ground. It should reach its destination by Monday.

I wasn't kidding. I just meant for it to be a surprise.
beeeepa's picture

*Pet pet.* S'alright

*Pet pet.*

S'alright Quaddykinz.

<3.

Im so sorry....My mother

Im so sorry....My mother passed away a few months ago..i know how you feel Quad T-T

&hearts; I'm so sorry quad

I'm so sorry quad
Serynn's picture

I'm so sorry... I've never

I'm so sorry... I've never even knew my dad's name. At least you had a relationship with yours, even if it was cut shorter than what you wanted.

R.I.P.
Chickenwhite's picture

Aww... I'm so sorry for you,

Aww...
I'm so sorry for you, this must be really tough for you...
If you're still in-game, I'd love to be part of this memorial...

I have no words. I'm so

I have no words. I'm so sorry.

you're such a strong person. &hearts you have my sincere condolences, Quad. you've been so collected throughout this entire ordeal...it's amazing. -hugs-

R.I.P. &hearts
Bylah's picture

I've always considered myself

I've always considered myself fortunate: I've never lost someone close to me, neither parent nor sibling.

I've always considered myself ignorant.

I cannot even begin to imagine how you and your family must be feeling; you all have my deepest condolences. I don't know the hurt and anguish of losing someone I love - not in any real, meaningful sense.

There is one thing I do know, though: All that you love will be carried away.

I know that sounds morbid, but it's not. Not really. We live and we die. It seems so unfair to those of us still living - to watch those that we love leave us, but that's just change. It's all just change, the changing of our lives and the passage of time.

You can't get yesterday back; Tomorrow is all you have to look forward to. I'm sure, right now, your Tomorrow looks bleak and empty. Maybe a little frightening, at that...but it will come, irregardless of how you feel.

It is how you decide to deal with Tomorrow that shows the intensity of your vigor.

Your father is lucky: he is now without pain, without worry. There's nothing for him to be afraid of.

And who, at some point in their life, hasn't wanted to be like their father?


Rest In Peace.. &hearts;

Rest In Peace.. ♥
;__;

ocean's picture

Rest in peace. &hearts; We're

Rest in peace. ♥
We're here for you, Quad.
Aegle's picture

Rest in Peace. -hug-

Rest in Peace. -hug-
Swifttail's picture

....congrats, you've won a

....congrats, you've won a lifetime supply of Sad-hugs!
*sadhug*
....yeah. That's just me trying to cheer you up.
....am I failing? ;.;
/is sorry for you ;.;

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